Sachiko called me and played me a song in Japanese based on the poem "Do Not Stand at My Grave and Weep." She played it in the background and interpreted it. It was really sweet and I really appreciated it. I found a video of the song on You Tube with English subtitles:
A Thousand Winds My rational mind really fights with this- but more and more I've been having experiences that have left me feeling some sort of connection/ communication from beyond the grave- (things like my experience getting my locket in Sea Ranch and Sachiko's contact). Yesterday, at Mono Hot Springs, I met a woman, a practicing shaman, who gave me a massage. She asked me if I knew what it was causing me pain and it made me just cry and cry. I told her about Abba and she told me there was no death, he was right there with me- that now he's even closer to me than he was in the physical form. The things she talked about reminded me of this song and poem that Sachiko shared. She talked a lot about how to work though pain (by thanking it for the experience and releasing it with love) and said something that about how we're all whole and complete, perfect beings-something that Abba had said to me before he died. Then, after she left the room, I heard his voice in my head saying "Forgive me." I've been thinking about that since. Maybe it's what I need to work on most. Maybe that's the only way I'll be able to move forward. That voice gave me the key toward healing.
On the way home "Time in a Bottle" played in the restaurant. it's been a song that's reminded me of Abba lately, so I had Nate make it the song of the day for this blog.
Sachiko said in Buddhism they believe that the spirits of those that died are still around us. Mariah said that there are Native American cultures that believe that a person does not truly die until all who knew the person is gone. He lives on in our memories and hearts. I have no rational explanation for the things I think I'm experiencing. Maybe it's just all in my brain and what I need to believe, but it helps me to think he's near, still sharing experiences with me, being my guardian angel and among the "thousand winds" around me.
